Am I Having a Mid-life Crisis?

midlifecrisis

Was there ever a moment in your life when you felt overwhelmed by how fast time flies?

I’m turning 26 in a few weeks and honestly, I don’t know what to feel. I’m the type of person who usually just go with the flow and didn’t care much on where the waves of life would take me. I’m easily contented with what I have and how my life is. Contented to the point that I built walls around me and just stayed inside my comfort zone. Technically, a person who keeps floating on an endless sea.

Then all of a sudden I felt like I was being dragged to face the battlefield called adulting. The problem with this battle is that no one can escape from it and that 20+ years is such a short time for training. What frustrates me more is that your “enemies” in this battle are time and yourself. And as of now, I still have no idea of how you can consider yourself victorious in this battle. Maybe I’m still young to know the answer? I’ll let you know in a few years, chos. Haha.

Sometimes I just wish that I could freeze time and just stay young forever. There were even some moments when I wanted to go back in time and just stay there. To go back in time wherein my biggest dilemma is which anime to watch during the afternoons or wonder which clow card Sakura will capture next. To go back in time wherein I waste my time inside my room and just draw and draw and draw the whole day. (Ironic isn’t it? I wish to go back in time to waste more time. Ang labo.) To go back in time wherein I didn’t care about politics, how to earn money, how I look like, or even the monthly bills.

giphy
via giphy

The thing is, I wanted to go back in time/ stay young because the future scares me. The uncertainty of the future scares me. I guess we will all come to a certain point when we’ll realize how important time is.

I’m no superhero and I can’t do anything about it. My ranting won’t help me either. I guess all I can do now is just cherish every moment and slowly prepare myself mentally, physically (?), and emotionally.

And to answer my own question above, yes. I’m having a mid-life crisis indeed.

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